Surviving and then thriving

In the last month, I’ve finally started to think I might actually make it. Getting laid off last fall was a devastating blow. At the time, I had plenty of friends – many of whom had been laid off themselves at some point – tell me they were certain things would work out for the better.

The logical part of my brain knew they were right. God would provide. I would find more work. I would survive. The emotional part of my brain just couldn’t comprehend such a concept. I was sure I’d hit a professional rock bottom with no hope of a lifeline.

My decision to pursue work as a self-employed freelancer seemed the only choice at the time, although a part of me wondered if I were dooming my family to a financial mess. But the work came in – a job here, a job there … then steady contract work and some more assignments.

And now I find myself busy, busy, busy. This summer, I’m planning to form my own official company and I just might make more money this year working for myself than I did last year working for someone else. And the good news is I won’t lay me off because of the economy and I will appreciate all my hard work and effort.

I’m grateful to the people who have given me work, referrals, recommendations and encouragement over the last several months. Thank you for having faith in me when I was having a hard time having faith in myself.

The double 3

So, today was the big 33. It was a pretty uneventful day. Although, I did take a nap and watch a little TV.

And, I played in my flowers, which is always fun. Here is a photo of my container gardens. I decided to combine some herbs, annuals and my strawberry and tomato plants into larger pots for the backyard. I'm hoping they will thrive in the added sunlight.

Guest blogging

I was really excited to be a recent guest blogger for The Organizing Mama, Stacey Crew. She has a great Web site and blog. I wrote about raising a green child and my efforts to make my home and family more environmentally friendly.

I consider myself pretty green. I recycle paper, plastics, glass and batteries. I don’t print too many documents and use both sides of the paper when I do. I rarely buy bottled water and reuse gift bags and ribbons. I think I finally have gotten into the habit of carrying my reusable bags into the grocery store. And I donate to thrift stores instead of tossing perfectly good clothing or household items in the trash.

Read more at The Organizing Mama Blog.

Never say never

Do you ever find yourself in a situation and it’s as if you’re watching yourself from the corner of the room? I had one of those moments yesterday. I was doing something I swore I would never do.

It was nothing crazy or illegal, mind you, it was just one of those things you never see yourself doing. It was something I’d mocked in the past and suddenly, there I was – part of the group I’d scoffed.

It doesn’t really matter what the situation was because I think we all have those experiences. For some, it might actually be something crazy or illegal, but for many of us it simply represents a shift, a change in who we are and what we wanted to – or didn’t want to – become.

And the me that was watching from the corner said quietly, “Never say never.”

We love our libraries

Apparently I wasn't the only one who jumped on her library soapbox after reading a column in our local newspaper. The comments I sent to the writer -- and comments from several other people -- were included in a follow up. Check out "Readers roar for increases in library funding."

Have you hugged your library lately?

On Tuesday morning, while sipping coffee and feeding Katherine her breakfast, I read a column in the "Family" section of the local newspaper. I was immediately drawn by the headline: "Encourage learning by funding libraries."

Local columnist Jennifer Berry Hawes writes about the joy of bringing home an armload of treasures from the library: “I gaze with great satisfaction at my library booty on the couch: books galore, a book on tape, DVDs and a CD of kids' music.”

It’s easy to take for granted all the library offers – and for free. It’s an amazing service. But in this current economic crunch time, libraries are at a crossroads.

As Jennifer’s column points out and as I’ve read about locally and nationally, libraries are busy places these days. Unemployed workers are using the free computers and Internet access to update resumes, search for jobs or submit electronic applications. People who are dropping NetFlix to save a few bucks find they can check out DVDs at the library for free. Avid readers who might have bought the latest John Grisham novel at Barnes & Noble are checking it out from the library and saving $20. America is rediscovering the joy of libraries.

While we should be celebrating one of our greatest public services, government budget cutbacks are hindering libraries’ progress.

Jennifer’s column points out a survey from the American Library Association, which “found that South Carolina libraries might see a 30 percent cut in state aid.”

Ouch.

So this week I’ve been thinking about libraries. I have loved books since I was born and was the kind of child who preferred reading on the couch to playing outdoors. When I was in elementary school, we went to the school library once a week. I would make a mad dash for the shelves holding the glorious mysteries of Nancy Drew. I would snatch up the latest issue of Ranger Rick magazine, reading the entire magazine overnight because it had to be returned the next day.

As a teenager, I would go to our small public library and get lost in the shelves, sucked into some other world of mystery or romance. To this day, every time I walk into a library, I breathe deeply, taking in that distinct library book smell that has the power to make your imagination come alive.

Now, as a mother, I daily read to Katherine. I take her to the local library, and even though she’s only 1, I’m doing my best to teach her books and libraries should be cherished.

I was so inspired I e-mailed Jennifer Berry Hawes telling her how much I appreciated her column. She had, somewhat in jest, mentioned a Save the Libraries bumper sticker campaign. I eagerly volunteered to help with any such effort.

I received a great e-mail response from Jennifer, who had heard from other library enthusiasts also eager to help. I plan to contact the local library and see what I can do.

If you haven’t been to your local library lately, stop by for a visit. Wander among the shelves, take in story time with your child, check out a movie or pick up the latest bestseller. I guarantee you’ll find our libraries are worth saving.

Retired dreams

He had made everything beautiful in its time. Ecclesiastes 3:11

On my recent post “What if?” reader Julie posted a comment and a question that has been on my mind almost daily:

I love the idea of new dreams; it's retiring the old ones that really challenge me. I have such a hard time letting go and leaving behind those things that are such a part of me. Any suggestions on really letting go?

Don’t think I’ve been ignoring your question, Julie, it’s just that I have been trying to think of a really great answer. I keep coming back to this idea of really letting go and I’m not sure it’s possible to truly let go of the dreams, as Julie puts it, “that are such a part of me.”

Sometimes our dreams just change with time or they simply fade away as new dreams consume our focus. In college, I dreamed of being an overseas correspondent, working as a reporter in a Spanish-speaking country. With time that dream was replaced with a new dream of being a political reporter, eventually covering state or federal government. At some point along the way, life intervened and that dream sort of just faded into my memory.

And some dreams are just plain fun and border on completely unrealistic. I dream of being a country music star. Crazy and most likely impossible? Definitely. But that doesn’t keep me from dreaming about singing a duet with George Strait.

Seriously, though, I think the longer we’ve had a dream the harder it is to let go. It has become a part of who we are and it’s difficult to simply cast that dream aside. And, quite frankly I’m not sure we should. It would be like denying a part of ourselves.

If we reach a point where it is time to retire a dream, I think the best thing to do is file it away. Don’t deny it. Don’t forget all about it. Don’t pretend it never existed. Tuck it away in that corner of your mind where fond memories live. It’s still there, waiting for you to pull it out one day and “remember when.”

Then fill your focus with a new dream, one that is attainable but that stretches you; a dream that both fits with your current circumstances, but also forces you to look to the future.

When people retire from a life-long career, they don’t dismiss that career and pretend it never existed. Instead they talk about that career with fondness while pursuing new goals and aspirations.

That’s the approach we can take with our “retired” dreams. Give them their due, but let the new dreams take center stage.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this process of retiring dreams. Please post a comment. And, Julie, hope that helps!